Before you can wear those eyes
by IsuzuForever
Summary: Oneshot! Those eyes are dangerous. They leave you vulnerable to be crushed. You need trust for the person you wear those eyes for. You must trust them to help you fly before you can show them that beauty that is most often forgotten in your soul.


A/N: ZOMG! It's a oneshot! It's obviously not Furuba which is a big thing right? lol. Well, I think it turned out nicely. I switched POV's so that you could get the event from both eyes, except the end part. . Anyway enjoy! I hope you like it! Any criticism welcomed and appricieated! This is my first Loveless so please tell me if I am OOC at any point. Thanks! 33

_+Before you can wear those eyes+_

"Get out Soubi!" Ritsuka yelled for the third time today.

"Ritsuka, I think you say that too much," I joked smirking and embracing the troubled child.

He tried to push me away but I only held onto him tighter and still smiling. Ritsuka eventually gave up and let me stand there and hold him. A warm, calming sensation flew over my body and I picked Ritsuka up.

"Put me down!" he yelled wiggling around.

I held him even if he didn't want me to. He again resigned to me just holding him. I sat on his bed and just cradled him and kissed random locks of hair every now and then. After a few minuets of silence Ritsuka spoke.

"Soubi…do you really love me or do you feel an obligation to be with me?" he asked looking up into my eyes.

I brought him closer to my body; my heart was running at the pace of light. I had never really thought of him as an obligation after I fell in love with him…I don't even remember a time when I wasn't in love with him. I had memories, but no connection to each of them before Ritsuka appeared in my life. It was as if those memories were some one else's and my own and I was just a viewer.

I looked into his eyes equally as deep. They held years of pain and confusion, I'm surprised that his tiny body could handle all the stress that comes with eyes like his. It was few times when I saw his eyes without pain reflected inside of his irises.

"Answer me Soubi!" he demanded as his face turned a little red because he was mad.

"My, my Ritsuka, such a temper," I smiled at him and closed my eyes gently.

"You're not answering me! I want to know!" he yelled turning even redder.

"The truth?" I asked.

"Why would I want you to lie to me?" he asked confused.

"The truth is…" I took a deep breath; I didn't want it to sound stupid and cheesy.

"Come on Soubi it's a simple question!" Ritsuka yelled again after he had already calmed down.

I drew him into my chest, put my index finger on his chin and brought his lips to meet mine.

"It's not a simple question Ritsuka," I replied. "It's unbelievable. At first it might have been just what Seimei had ordered me to do…" I trailed off.

Ritsuka looked like he was about to cry and he didn't want me to see it. He looked at the ground and wiped his face off quickly, thinking I didn't see it. I cupped his cheek and made him look at me.

"I don't know when, I don't know how…I fell in love with you," I finished kissing him lightly.

"Do you mean it?" he asked with his eyes full of desire.

Those eyes are dangerous. They leave you vulnerable to be crushed. You need trust for the person you wear those eyes for. You must trust them to help you fly before you can show them that beauty that is most often forgotten in your soul.

I couldn't take seeing his eyes like that and not being able to help him fly. But they demanded that I looked at them. I wanted so badly to be his wings, but I couldn't. Some one like me can't be wings for some one like Ritsuka.

Switching POV's+

He came in my room as it had been since the first time he did it many months ago. I couldn't stand being near him but being away from him was constant agony. It was as if he were tugging at my heart and trying to make me cry over him. But I knew that if I cried it would mean that I could be hurt by exposing myself for all to see.

"Soubi…do you really love me or do you feel an obligation to be with me?" I asked nuzzling into his chest.

I wanted to know, it was something that I had been wondering ever since he said it to me in the park. In truth I loved him, even if I was confused about why I did and how, I just knew that something that felt this complicated had to be love of some sort.

He didn't answer me as fast as he usually does. What could possibly be going thorough his mind? Did he really not love me and he just didn't want to say it? A million things were racing through my mind.

_He doesn't love me! I knew this was going to happen! Why did I let myself think that there was some one who would love me? _

My mind was screaming at me and I didn't like it.

"Answer me Soubi!" I yelled, even though I didn't mean to, it just came out that way.

"My, my Ritsuka, what a temper," he said smiling.

_He's just stalling for time to tell me that he doesn't love me and he's only doing this because Seimei ordered him to! _

"You're not answering me! I want to know!" I yelled even louder.

It was accidental, I really didn't want to yell at him, but I couldn't help it! Most of the time I wanted to chase him away and know that he would always come back. Soubi always made me feel as if I were wanted and desired.

"The truth?" he asked interrupting my thoughts.

"Why would I want you to lie to me?" I returned puzzled.

_What kind of a question is that? Why would some on want to be lied to? What a horrible thing…I never want to be lied to like I have been…_

He took even longer this time, "Come on Soubi! It's a simple question!"

All he had to say was either that he loved me, or that I was an obligation, I didn't want to make things more complicated.

He suddenly kissed me…I loved it, the way his mouth seemed to fit mine so well, it always has amazed me, and I know it will continue to so. But I didn't want a kiss, I wanted an answer.

"It's not a simple question Ritsuka," he paused drawing deep breaths of air into his lungs. "It's unbelievable. At first it might have been just what Seimei had ordered me to do…"

As he said this I felt my heart being torn in all directions. I wanted to cry...I knew something like this was going to happen…but I couldn't stop myself from falling for him. Apparently he couldn't love me. Maybe it was my age? Maybe he didn't like my looks?

_It's wrong for him to do that…saying that he loves me only because  
Seimei told him to…it's wrong to hurt people in this way…_

Soubi brought my face to his and I couldn't turn away. I was sitting on his lap, arms dormant by my sides and my face in front of his…I couldn't move.

"I don't know when, I don't know how…I fell in love with you," Soubi finally answered my question and then kissed me.

The shape…so unique…so right. Our bodies were made for each other in every way. The way my hand fit in his, the way his lips could be placed on mine without hassle, the way his arms always could make me feel like I fit in this world.

"Do you mean it?" I asked looking into his eyes.

Soubi looked like he was in a lot of pain from just that question. He looked at me but his eyes looked as if they were trying to look away.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing at all Ritsuka…" he lied…I knew he was going to.

"Don't lie to me! I want to know what's wrong! Tell me! That's an order!"

Soubi smiled and a little chuckle escaped his lips. My ears and tail both stood straight up as I yelled at him. He reached over and patted my head and I relaxed. My cat ears folded back and my tail swished from side to side. I took a hold of my tail and tried to hold it still.

"You're adorable Ritsuka," Soubi complimented trying to dodge my question.

"Don't try to change the subject!" I yelled again letting my tail go.

"Nothing's wrong Ritsuka…just worried," he answered lightly.

I tilted my head to the side and looked at him more puzzled than ever.

"About what?"

"You…" Soubi looked at me with serious eyes this time.

"Why? I'm fine right now," I reassured him keeping my head tilted.

"You could get hurt easily…"

_Why does he always talk so cryptically? Why can't he just answer me?_

"What the hell does that mean?" I yelled standing up and pacing.

Soubi smiled and hugged me, and just laughed a little.

"Ritsuka, you could get hurt easily, that's what I mean," he repeated.

"Why did you say that?" I asked folding my ears back again but this time my tail fell down and didn't swish or stand up.

"Your eyes…"

I closed my eyes and then said, "What do they have to do with anything?"

Soubi laughed again and kissed my eye lids gently.

"They just tell me when you feel like you can trust me, and I don't know if anyone else can see it."

"They can't! Okay?" I yelled smiling a little.

Soubi and I laughed for a little bit.

"Hey Soubi," I said knowing that he would look at me.

"Yes?" he responded smiling a looking at me.

I kissed him on the lips quickly and then looked at him. He placed his hand on the back of my head and slowly brought our faces together…closer…closer…

A knock at my door broke the tone, it was my mom.

"Ritsuka? Do you have some one in there with you?" she asked pretending to be nice. "I want to meet them!"

"Hurry Soubi! Get out!" I ordered in a hush tone.

He kissed me and then took his leave out of the same window he entered many times before.


End file.
